mizmich's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dear friend Last day of school tomorrow! WHOOOOSH. oh wait. I gotta address something. Dear Jeanie, maybe this is my only way of communicating to you. I don't know. I tried to make things clear, but they don't seem to work either. There's more you ought to know, but i guess you might take it the wrong way and think of me destroying something you've built. I can safely say there were plenty of misunderstandings and things deep down that we dig up and put it in front of us. Risk it all or nothing at all. So I guess, right now all you want is nothing at all. It may seemed what I say on letters and on my blog entries contradict. But I can't publisize names and whatsoever, how am I to make clear of anything like that. You know how mean and TWO FACED people can be. How they want the best of both worlds and get silly kicks out of seeing people's friendships get ruined. To you, it may not seem like the general. But 'you' refers to everybody no matter how personal it may sound. Maybe you take it personally when it wasn't even meant for you. *shrugs I don't know. But you gotta pick and choose which is yours. It doesn't make sense does it. I write sentences that you gotta read between the lines. I know how being scared's like. But I can't put my finger on it anymore. I guess you might not know me any longer. Because I'm not the person you pictured me to be and I strongly insist on that. And it hurts me to know you think of me like that. It eats me up inside to think of you thinking of me like that. Now I know I don't know you already. Is it true? Is it still true? But needless to say, you're still my bestie deep down(oh gawd. the tears.) and I still care no matter how much you hate me or think how bad of a person I am from your perception and what you heard.and I tried protecting you,but i guess you don't want it anymore. Just take care of yourself. Not everyone's as good on the surface as what they seem cos I've been there done that. I got played out by the very person whom I think may have gotten the wrong impression of helping us, either that or that person's a two faced freak.I guess you know who is it, and of course, you'd ask me why I didn't heed your early advice. But as what I said earlier on, I thought I could help that person out, but to no avail. So can you see the big picture already? I hope you know all these and I hope you care somehow.And if you can't find anyone else to talk to, call me. Somehow everything's gonna fall 10:14 p.m. - 2006-10-12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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